Monday, September 20, 2010

Meg Cabot is TEAM UNICORN!

Best Selling Author MEG CABOT joins The Faerie Drink Review to share why she is Team Unicorn!

Why am I Team Unicorn?

Honestly, I have nothing against zombies. I've seen every zombie movie ever made (The Crazies, both the remake and the George A Romero original, are sitting on my DVD shelf right now. I honestly can't decide which I love better . . . well, OK: I'm Team Tim Olyphant). I love screaming, "Oh my God, BEHIND YOU!" at the screen.

But who'd want a pet zombie? You'd have to keep him chained in the yard, poor thing, and then you'd have to keep up a steady supply of brains, which would be difficult, though not impossible, as I know from experience, unfortunately, because of the decade I worked in a dorm at NYU, where a "hilarious" prank of the students was to leave human brains (from the medical lab) in various places for hapless bystanders to find.

This was how I happened to be sitting at my desk one day when someone knocked on the door to my office and said, "Excuse me, miss. But I just thought you should know. There's a brain on the elevator."

Yes. I had someone say that to me. At work.

And then I had get up and go look at it and determine that, yes, indeed, it was a brain, and then listen to the endless jokes as people took pictures of it (because we had to shut down the elevator and wait for the coroner, because when you find body parts in real life, you have to report them to the coroner's office, even when you know they're a prank and from the medical lab, and in NYC, it takes like FIVE hours for the coroner to come. Which is a lot of time to not have an elevator work in a 17 story building).

(And no you can't move the body part in the interim, or the coroner gets mad. TRUST ME ON THIS ONE.)

And everyone would say, laughing as they took their photos, "Dude . . . this is your brain. On the elevator!"

(You know, from that old Keep Off Drugs ad, the one with the frying egg? "This is your brain, on drugs." OK. Never mind.)

So, anyway, I would rather have a pet unicorn, because they eat lovely things, such as Lucky Charms (well, I don't know, but maybe) and flowers and apples. Not brains. Which are gross in real life if you've ever had to see one up close while putting up CAUTION: CRIME SCENE. DO NOT CROSS tape in front of it, and then sit next to it for hours to make sure no one touches it until the coroner comes.

I'm just saying. Team Unicorn.

Any questions, you zombie wussies?

Follow Meg Cabot on Twitter!


Genevieve said...

Devyn, I'm so jealous that Meg Cabot did a guest blog!

What an awesome post for Team Unicorn. I would hate to find brains while at work. : (

Jess said...

This is the awesomest thing I have read all day. Srsly.

BookChic said...

Best guest post ever. I love Meg Cabot- so cool she dropped by your blog!! :)

And ZvU was an awesome anthology!